Bathroom Karate

Sometimes you need to rage, just let it loose to alleviate the frustrations.  Sure there’s the gym and I do frequent that establishment but it’s nothing like a good roundhouse kick in a public place or a karate chop as you open the door not knowing who might be in the next room.  It’s exciting after sitting in a cubicle all day, it’s riveting after explaining bureaucracy, it’s refreshing after a team building event.  In my opinion, the risk of getting caught doing karate in the bathroom is the essence of feeling alive. Here’s to life my friends…and doing karate in the bathroom.

I enter the room, looking around just to see

If anyone has been following me.

Clear to my left, no one on my right

Look behind me in the mirror ,then …HIGHT!

Karate Chop, Karate Chop, Flying Fists

Round house, jump kick, no one’s missed

Then more ninjas, over there, through the door, You fool

I crouch down low before I pour on the cool

Hi Ya Left Kick, Right Kick, to the fists of fury

Hi Ya overhead punch as I watch them scurry.

More coming at me, yes this time from behind

I see 6, or 7 is that 8 no its 9.

I serve up some elbow, then downed with a knee

Perhaps you would like something from the menu I see

 Kung Fu Kicken with a Karate Chopped Salad

And some ice palm slice cream to cleanse the palette.

  Now it goes beyond the insane…..

Spitting camel, wading duck then crane of pain.

As the dust  settles, I hear the silence of victory

And realize I don’t have one nick on me.

I stand upright and victorious

Dwelling in all that is glorious.

When the bathroom door becomes a jar

And I hear someone enter from afar.

Quickly, I become composed

Back to myself, from head to toes.

I dry my hands. “How are you today?”

And smile because my secret is safe, sensei.

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